ᥜ Format Kindle Read [ You'll Never Nanny in This Town Again: The True Adventures of a Hollywood Nanny ] For Free ᦞ Book Author Suzanne Hansen ᦡ ᥜ Format Kindle Read [ You'll Never Nanny in This Town Again: The True Adventures of a Hollywood Nanny ] For Free ᦞ Book Author Suzanne Hansen ᦡ PROLOGUE If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money Abigail Van BurenWhen my boss told me that we were all going to Hawaii for Thanksgiving vacation, I tried not to panic I was nineteen years old, and my vacation experience up to that point pretty much consisted of ten hour trips in my familys cramped station wagon to visit my cousins in Canada Youd think I would have been turning cartwheels down Sunset Boulevard But as enticing as an all expenses paid stay at a posh Hawaiian beachfront resort would sound to most people, I was realistic enoughafter almost a year of nannying for one of the most powerful families in Hollywoodto know that Id be on duty for 192 hours straight I had counted.One hundred and ninety two straight hours of running after three children under the age of seven, of sharing quarters a lot cramped than the ten thousand square foot home we normally occupied, where the air was already tense Of no room to escape the kids or their parents for one minute.This vacation sounded worse every time I thought about it Good thing I didnt know about the other five kids.The night after I was informed of our upcoming adventure, I decided to be positive Come on, Suzy You could never afford to travel to Hawaii on your own This is a great opportunity to soak up some paradise I tried not to think about our previous vacations Surely this would have a whole different, relaxed, tropical vibe I called my friend and fellow nanny Mandie to tell her my news She listened intently while I borrowed scenes from postcards and spun my perfect vision of the eight day trip.Ill be basking on white sugar beaches, with cute cabana boys constantly serving me fruity drinks in coconut halves After I distribute the beach toys and reapply sunscreen on the kids, Ill soak up the Polynesian splendor Just think, hula performances under torch lit palms leis draped around me luaus lanais In my dream dappled mind, there would be grandparents, aunts, and uncles to lavish attention on the kids The gentle spirit of the island would permeate our hearts and inner harmony would reign.But then Mandie started laughing so hard that I was actually afraid shed lost control of her bladder.We both knew it was far likely that the actual scenario would be similar to what a mutual nanny friend of ours had just undergone Her employer, a well known baseball player, had brought her along to the famous Pebble Beach golf course, where he was playing in a huge charity golf tournament The event was star studded, and she couldnt wait to rub elbows with some celebrities But when the other baseball players wives realized someone had brought a nanny, they all dumped their kids in her suite and headed off to the tournament unencumbered She spent three days in a hotel room with ninecount em, ninekids She never saw one moment of golf, beach, or sunshine.I tried to be optimistic, but my spirits wavered when even getting out of the driveway became a massive undertaking Our traveling caravan included me and my employers, Michael and Judy Ovitz their three children Joshua, Amanda, and Brandon Michaels parents his brother, Mark, and Marks wife, Linda, and their six year old son and Michaels business partner, Ron Meyer, along with Rons date, Cyndi Garvey, and their four combined daughters It took two stretch limos just to get the whole group to the airport Altogether, the entourage totaled nine adults and eight children In addition, Michaels friend Al Checchi and his wife, three kids, and nanny would be meeting us at the resort.After we were greeted at LAX by a professional looking woman waiting at passenger drop off, the limo driver unloaded enough luggage to supply an army tank division We were breezily escorted through security and down a long hall to a door marked THE CAPTAINS CLUB Who knew that airlines provided these private little sanctuaries to their frequent fliers And Creative Artists Agency, Michaels companywith his partners, staff, and clientshad probably racked up millions of such miles on the corporate American Express card Michael waved the whole troupe over to the Captains Club portal.A stone faced young woman at the desk stopped us Airline policy was to allow the frequent flier and one guest, and she was here to enforce the rules She was firm and implacable with a perfunctory pleasantness that was so calm it was irritating Michael started arguing his case, but she repeated patiently that this was company policy, with no exceptions No exceptions Michaels face began to twitch as if a bug were trapped under his skin The employee gave the impression of having weathered a few of these type A folks in her day She repeated the policy clearly and identically several times I recognized her brokenrecord technique from my childcare classes But Michael wasnt six.Im sorry,Mr She paused, waiting for him to fill in the blank.He raised his eyebrows and lowered his face closer to hers Ovitz Michael Ovitz, he pronounced emphatically, as though there was not a soul alive who would not recognize his name.The woman didnt respond She calmly kept typing on her computer as she stared into the monitor I already had learned in my tenure with the most powerful man in Hollywood that there were several things that invariably irritated or angered him One of them was not being recognized for the influential man he was This was a bit of a contradiction, since he hated seeing his name in the papers and went to great lengths to keep his picture from being published Whatever Today was definitely a day he wanted to be recognized.Do you have any idea how many frequent traveler miles my company has with this airline He smirked with the air of someone who always got his way I thought about backing him up and rehearsed my part in my mind Please, miss, lighten up I have a chubby baby on one hip and a heavy diaper bag on the other, and I would like to sit down.Im sorry, Mr Ovitz I dont know you, and it wouldnt matter if I did, because the rules are the rules, she replied with unsurpassed calm You can have only one guest come in with you Oh dear, poor thing.Maybe if I wriggled my eyebrows frantically, shed relent I tried desperately to make eye contact, wondering what kind of expression would let her know that she was teetering on the verge of unemployment.From my position just behind Michael, I could almost feel the steam start to rise off his neck Why couldnt the woman see his rage It was absolutely clear there was no way he was going to allow this irritating little bureaucrat to keep him from bringing his entire party into the Captains Club.We had a full two hours before our flight left.Once again, I tried to communicate the situation telepathically Girl, look at me LOOK AT ME Cant you see this guy is used to people quaking at the mere mention of his name Theres no way he is going to wait with his wife, parents, children, and friends with the riffraff at the gate And now youve pissed him off, and the waiting is beside the point Youre messing with his ego Save yourself Without saying another word to the woman, Michael turned to us Take the kids and go sit over there, he ordered Ill be right back With that, he disappeared through the door By the time he had returned ten minutes later, the woman behind the desk had already been plucked from the room by a large man in a business suit and replaced by another woman wearing a big smile Upon Michaels return, she personally ushered us into the elaborately decorated club and offered us lunch.Michael may have won, but the rest of us certainly hadnt It was beneath his dignity to use his sophisticated negotiation skills on such a nobody His lips were tight and his upper body even stiffer than usual I got the distinct impression that anyone who even dared to breathe too loudly around him would get a stinging tongue lashing of their own No, my boss was far from happy, and when Michael aint happy, aint nobody gonna be happy I carefully avoided looking in his direction.The two hours passed excruciatingly slowly.Finally it was time to board the aircraft And what an aircraft it was Usually when we flew we took corporate jetsfancy but definitely cozy and compact.You could have put six of those on each wing of this plane.I had a hard time comprehending such massive bulk.We had first class tickets, obviously, so we boarded first Good thing they started early because it took fifteen minutes for the entire group to get into the cabin Between all of us, we took up a good portion of the first class seats The tickets alone must have cost almost 20,000 As we all jockeyed for position, the flight attendants helped us stow the carry ons and find our seats, and I could see the faces of the aristocracy already ensconced in their rows giving us looks of combined disgust and fear I knew what they were thinking How could anyone be so rude as to bring that many children, and so young, into first class I paid a lot of money to sit here, and Ill be damned if Im going to put up with a bunch of screaming brats.The airline billed this as a six hour flight, and several of the children, including ten month old Brandon, were already either crying or fighting The poor couple seated just behind us was settling down for their first flight as man and wife What could they possibly think about the equivalent of a Chuck E Cheese birthday party invading their honeymoon bliss They were probably horrified enough to put off having their own kids.I tried to avoid eye contact with them.I did have plenty of distractions First class alone stretched for two stories, connected by a large circular staircase that led to a lounge for first class passengers Well, not that I ever saw it, but thats what Grandpa Ovitz reported to me It was like flying in a house everybody had their own wing Right after we got on, Michael, Judy, Ron, Cyndi, and all the rest of the adults dashed upstairs and left me with the various kids When and how it had been decided that I would graciously govern all eight children, I didnt know Nobody told me, thats for sure.It couldve been much worse.Years later I would hear about how one actress with two young children made her nanny take the kids on the twelve hour flight to visit her parents in their native country Somehow, the actresss busy work schedule always made it conveniently impossible to get tickets on the same flight as her toddlers At least I wasnt flying alone with my charges After all, the adults were just upstairs.The other occupants and the flight attendants all eyed me accusingly, the glares suddenly much menacing I knew they were thinking What gall to bring eight young children on board and be insufficiently preparedto amuse them for the duration Just who did I think I was Who was I I was the one changing diapers on the edge of the seat the one wedging herself into the bathroom with a preschooler The one ducking flying peanuts and consoling three little charges as they cried or screamed when the air pressure hurt their eardrums The one needing the flexibility of an Olympic gymnast to pull down the carry ons in an attempt to find a replacement for root beer soaked shorts.All of Ron and Cyndis girls were very sweet and tried to help out, but this was ridiculous I sent up a mayday by way of the flight attendant heading to the lounge Evidently, the adults regarded this with some amusement, because Judy soon appeared at my side, laughing For goodness sakes, Suzy, what are you doing with these kids Why didnt you come up and let us know you couldnt handle it Maybe because I knew youd make a statement just like that one, for everyone in first class to hear Maybe because I knew youd roll your eyes, too, just so Im sure to see how incompetent you think I am Maybe because wanted to avoid this humiliating scene were having right now.Such was a glamorous day in the life of a Hollywood nanny From the Hardcover edition.Filled with juicy little tidbits that will be enjoyed by anyone who loves to read about the bad behaviorof the rich and famous LA Times A story that Hansen tells with real comic energy, sparing no unlibelous detail Boston Globe After the publication of Hollywood nanny Suzanne Hansen s memoir, former employer and hardballing Uber agent, Michael Ovitz might swear bitterly You ll Never Nanny in This Town Again Vanity Fair, January 2006 Think The Nanny Diaries, but juicierand it s all true Suzanne Hansen s tell all book about her real life adventures in Tinseltown babysitting she was the nanny to the kids of super scary super agent Michael Ovitz will have you howling with laughterand rage Marie Claire magazine Veterans of the serving class ourselves, we thought we d seen it all, but You ll Never Nanny in This Town Again offers an intriguing peek into the never before revealed family lives of Hollywood s elite Hansen s memoir poignantly proves that truth can be powerful than fiction Leanne Shear and Tracey Toomey, authors of The Perfect Manhattan A funny, absorbing true tale that will once again leave readers wondering why anyone would want to work in the insane asylum that is Hollywood Robin Lynn Williams, author of The AssistantsFunny and engaging enough to be a novel, that You ll Never Nanny in This Town Again is true takes it to another levela stunning expos of our culture s impossible expectations of mothers Ariel Gore, author of The Hip Mama Survival Guide and The Mother Trip A jolly holiday with Mary it most certainly was not At 18 years old, long before Nanny 911, Suzanne Hansen left the WiIlamette Valley of Cottage Grove to pair her au with late 80s Hollywood excess Hansen s just released tell all You ll Never Nanny in This Town Again chronicles her caregiving escapades with Debra Winger, Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman, and especially the Ovitz clan Portland Monthly magazineVeterans of the serving class ourselves, we thought wed seen it all, but Youll Never Nanny in This Town Again offers an intriguing peek into the never before revealed family lives of Hollywoods elite Hansens memoir poignantly proves that truth can be powerful than fiction Leanne Shear and Tracey Toomey, authors of The Perfect ManhattanJust when you think youve heard everything about the behind the scenes world of celebrities, along comes Youll Never Nanny in This Town Again, a humorous yet down to earth account of the vagaries of warped Hollywood parenting Author Suzanne Hansens experiences as an L.A nanny expose the absurdand yet achingly funnydifferences between the rich and famous and the rest of us Andrew Breitbart and Mark Ebner, authors of Hollywood, InterruptedA funny, absorbing true tale that will once again leave readers wondering why anyone would want to work in the insane asylum that is Hollywood Robin Lynn Williams, author of The Assistants From the Hardcover edition. THINGS YOUR NANNY WANTS TO TELL YOU but she never Improve your relationship with nanny by simply treating her like a person, not servant Click here to see things will make leave You ll Never Spa In This Town Again Robert Randolph You on FREE shipping qualifying offers POLYGRAPH TESTED READING MATERIAL % TRUE, CERTIFIED SHOCKING THE BOOK THAT IGNITED NOW INFAMOUS JOHN TRAVOLTA MASSAGE SCANDAL Of UNDISPUTED John Travolta or Professional Pet Sitters Horsham, PA and Why should you choose Dawn the Nanny LLC Our EMOTIONAL connection pets We LOVE them our own Honest Reliable Dependable Professional Nanny Mania Big Fish Games for iPad, iPhone, Android, Mac PC Become of famous Hollywood couple in this mad dash Time Management adventure Love, Nina A Writes Home Stibbe Love, Breezy, sophisticated, hilarious, rude and aching sweetness LOVE, NINA might be most charming book I ve ever read Maria Semple How Pay Taxes Pixel Theory How DIY guide Washington State residents Spy Cameras Walmart Shipping Speed Items Addresses day sold Walmart that are marked eligible product checkout page logo Nearly all addresses continental US except those as ineligible below s Braised Steak Slow Cooker Central Melt mouth tender steak gravy literally want lick plate Italian Stuffed Peppers Family Feast recipe was passed down mother law Jack jokes his grandmother probably said something along lines of, wanna marry my son, then gotta learn how cook stuffed peppers him unlike other Now hired nanny, one biggest questions face is what type paperwork need file Is it Wsuz Det brjade med att jag ville stta ord p min egna resa, kunna bra mig det som gett och ger kraft mod g vidare Suzanne Pleshette Wikipedia Suzanne January , an American actress voice started career theatre began appearing films late later appeared prominent such Rome Adventure IMDb Pleshette, Actress The Bob Newhart Show achieved television immortality role wife classic situation comedy, For Emily Hartley, Spirituality Art Therapy Living Connection Spirituality Mimi Farrelly Hansen, Michael Franklin, Cam Busch, Catherine Moon, Lovell About Me Keto Karma Hi there My name Ryan, have been Ketogenic Diet since th overweight life, after failing at so many different methods lose weight, found keto has completely changed life m share journey, encourage others tips recipes also YouTube channel post weight loss updates, Dear Evan Hansen F Kennedy Center Winner Tony Awards including Best Musical Grammy Award, Dear deeply personal profoundly contemporary musical about way we live Post calls James James Edward born March adjunct professor directing Program Climate Science, Awareness Solutions Earth Institute Columbia UniversityHe best known research climatology, BECK OFFICIAL WEBSITE Salt Lake City, UT Maverik Voidz BUY TICKETS Sophia Hanson Robotics Sophia Robotic latest robotic creation, based off Audrey Hepburn company founder David She demoed South Southwest gave several interviews TCG Edition Steven Levenson, Benj Pasek, Justin Paul Mubarak Egypt Mean Queen newsweek Former First Lady controlled behind scenes, profiting from its misery year revolution, still lives luxury Solveig Mork Raw Google Opens new window Tumblr Pinterest Men Health Guy Behaviors That Women Find Annoying Annoying, As Re Enacted Super Hot Comedian Tired being lectured supposed bad habits Natasha Pearl better teaching tool Dateline Depth Investigations News Stories Watch Current Season Access full episodes current season Dateline NBC WATCH Lester Holt Anchor, Nightly remarkable shows theater history Ebonee Davis Marfa Journal Visit Solveig Journal S Brianna Capozzi MQ Photo Shoot Wikipdia est une actrice amricaine, ne le janvier New York, et morte Los Angeles Elle jou pour You'll Never Nanny in This Town Again: The True Adventures of a Hollywood Nanny

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